My Spouse Needs More Help Than I Can Give

Who This Page Is For

• • Husband or wife caregivers whose partner's physical or cognitive needs are growing beyond what one person can manage
• • Aging couples where both spouses have health challenges and need additional support at home
• • Working spouses who are trying to balance a job with full-time caregiving responsibilities
• • Adult children who see their caregiving parent declining and want to help without overstepping

The Crisis Facing Michigan's Spousal Caregivers

According to AARP's latest Caregiving in the U.S. report, more than 1.6 million Michigan residents serve as unpaid family caregivers — and the largest and most vulnerable group is spousal caregivers over age 65. In the communities we serve across Oakland, Macomb, and Wayne counties, we see the same story unfold again and again: a devoted husband or wife slowly wearing down physically while insisting they can handle everything alone.

The statistics are sobering. Spousal caregivers over 65 who provide more than 36 hours of care per week are 63% more likely to die within four years than non-caregivers of the same age. According to the Journal of the American Medical Association. Many develop what geriatricians call "caregiver syndrome" — a combination of chronic stress, sleep deprivation, and neglected personal health that mirrors the effects of aging itself.

In Troy, Rochester Hills, West Bloomfield, and Shelby Township, we work with couples who waited too long — and couples who got ahead of it. The difference is profound. Families who bring in professional support before the caregiving spouse reaches a breaking point keep both partners healthier. Maintain their relationship as a marriage rather than a patient-nurse dynamic. And often delay or avoid facility placement entirely.